"
I was bored, angry, tired and sad.
None of us..
I don't think we should be sorry for who we are.
It's my way of saying HERE I AM.
This discovery is what prompted me to write.
It's like opening a door to the truth and starting to breathe a new type of air.
I am finally able to show the world that I am a bit of an idiot who dances around her kitchen in her knickers and makes silly videos with her husband, as well as a responsible parent and a businesswoman who runs her own company.
When you find authenticity it's hard to go back.
But the truth is, we can be all of them without having to choose.
I panicked, thinking about how I am slowly approaching middle age and the menopause and I wondered how many years do I have left of being 'f**ckable' before everything starts going downhill?"
We have many sides to us, most of the time we think we must choose just one character and stick to it.
I looked at my messy SUV after my yoga class one morning and I wanted to vomit on it all.
I didn't want to live by some label that didn't represent me.
I wanted to be desired, to make someone's hair stand on end and go crazy for me.
I didn't want to be looked at as just a 'mom'.
I was frustrated with having the same married sex I'd been having for the past seven years, or not having any sex at all.
I was sick of having the same dull conversations about meal plans and kid-friendly holidays.
But inside, I was growing restless.
I had a good job, a husband who as far as I could tell wasn't shagging his assistant, three children who apart from being the occasional assholes were pretty good kids; a house, a dog and everything else we are told as little girls we should aspire to.
I felt all alone yet I had nothing to complain about. "
I was bored, angry, tired and sad
